Doh...
In the wake of finding out Mother is ill, She was told that she would have to go and have a biopsy of her temperal artery to a. Confirm the diagonisis and b. To see how bad it is and whether she might just regain some of the sight she has lost.
On the day, Dad dropped her off and because hospitals like you to register that you are there like 52 hours before your appointment* Dad then buggered off home for a few hours to potter about and try not to blow himself up without Mothers supervision when making a cup of tea.
It was then that he managed to bump into Ivor. Ivor is a really, really old man who lives opposite my parents (and must be about 150 years old by now cos back when I was little he was really old then) and is the street BIGGEST gossip. For an old man who cannot walk without the aid of his shopping trolley for support anything you tell him gets around that street faster than Speedy Gonzalas. On speed.
Anyway, Ivor had noticed that Mother wasn't about and asked our Dad where she was.
Dad told him... 'Oh, our Pat's gone in for a lobotomy today.'
As you can imagine, Mother got some odd stares from her neighbours and half of England that day when she walked from the car to the house without the aid of a wheelchair and dribbling everywhere 3 hours after her 'lobotomy'.
Fucking lobotomy.
*ok maybe just 4 hours but for a half blind old woman who can't go 5 minutes without a fag it does feel like 52 hours!
On the day, Dad dropped her off and because hospitals like you to register that you are there like 52 hours before your appointment* Dad then buggered off home for a few hours to potter about and try not to blow himself up without Mothers supervision when making a cup of tea.
It was then that he managed to bump into Ivor. Ivor is a really, really old man who lives opposite my parents (and must be about 150 years old by now cos back when I was little he was really old then) and is the street BIGGEST gossip. For an old man who cannot walk without the aid of his shopping trolley for support anything you tell him gets around that street faster than Speedy Gonzalas. On speed.
Anyway, Ivor had noticed that Mother wasn't about and asked our Dad where she was.
Dad told him... 'Oh, our Pat's gone in for a lobotomy today.'
As you can imagine, Mother got some odd stares from her neighbours and half of England that day when she walked from the car to the house without the aid of a wheelchair and dribbling everywhere 3 hours after her 'lobotomy'.
Fucking lobotomy.
*ok maybe just 4 hours but for a half blind old woman who can't go 5 minutes without a fag it does feel like 52 hours!
posted by LMPP at 10:19 AM
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